Beautiful
by Nine1
Summary: Ken needs to be reminded of his beauty...so Daisuke decides to help him. Ken+Daisuke, slightly Kensuke. Rated for swearing and angst.


A/N: I couldn't get this out of my head. It was just stuck in there and wouldn't go away...so I wrote it down. Okay, this could be viewed as either Ken+Daisuke or Kensuke. Whichever way you want to take it. I intentionally left out more romantic things so maybe more people would read it. I still like it a lot. Um...Ken does blush once or twice. Does that make it Kensuke? I don't know, you be the judge. Anyways, read on.

Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon, okay?! 

Beautiful

Though he had been lying there for hours, the cold did not bother Ken. Everything in the world except for the temperature of the water bothered Ken, but the cold helped to numb his body a little, and it was strangely comforting to him in a way. He gently moved his foot against the bottom of the tub, stirring the water slightly, making a small splashing sound. He stared up at the ceiling, his lips slightly parted, his eyes almost closed, but not quite shut, and his hair plastered to the back of the tub that he was laying against. He wondered to himself how long he had lain there. Hours? Days? Years, perhaps? He wished he had a clock.

He slid down further and let the water touch his earlobes, the bottom of his chin touching the surface of the water when he moved his head forward slightly. He stared at his white, skinny knees, and slowly lifted one leg out of the water, staring at it. He moved it to the side and tilted his head in the opposite direction, looking at a thin line on the back of his calf that only he would notice. He knew it was there, even though he could barely see it even if he tried, what with his skin so white now. 

He heard footsteps coming to the door again, and wished people would stop bothering him. Hadn't he sent his mother away a while ago?

"Ken," a voice called. Not his mother. No, at least it wasn't her again.

"What?" he whispered.

"Ken!" the voiced called a bit louder.

"What?" he called back, his voice cracking into a whine.

"Can I come in?"

"I'm taking a bath."

"You've been taking a bath for the past five hours, I've been told. I think you're clean now."

Ken laughed, though not pleasantly. "Me? I'll never be clean."

"I'm going to come in."

"The door's locked."

"I have a key."

Ken cursed and slid into the water so his head submerged. This way he couldn't quite make out what the voice was saying, since it was distorted, and he could ignore it easier. 

The door opened and he opened his eyes underwater to take in the blurry figure moving into the room. 

Ken shot out of the water, gasping, eyes narrowed and glaring out from behind the curtain of black hair, darkened by the water. 

He grabbed the curtain and yanked it shut before the person could even shut the door behind himself.

"Did you see me?"

"No, I was looking down at the floor."

Ken brought his knees up and sat up in the tub, resting his elbows on his knees and shoving his fingers into his hair, his forehead resting on his palms.

"I don't want to talk."

"You never do, do you?"

"Don't you believe in privacy?"

"Not when you're endangering yourself."

"How am I endangering myself?"

"For one, the water's probably so cold you could get a high fever or something, and for another, I've been told you haven't been seen eating anything for days now."

"Who tells you all of these things?"

"I have connections."

Ken rested his chin on his arms. "What else did she tell you?"

His friend smiled at him. "Who said it was a she?"

"I know my mother told you all about me and tried to get you to come see me, Daisuke."

The spiky-haired redhead leant back against the door, crossing his feet at the ankles. "How much do you weigh, Ken?"

"None of your business."

"Actually, it is. See, I'm your friend, and I care about your well-being, and if I think you're unhealthy, it is my business to find out what's wrong."

"You want to know what's wrong? Everything is wrong. Everything, Daisuke."

"I refuse to believe that, Ken."

"Mom already tried to talk me out of the tub. She didn't succeed. You won't, either."

"How do you know that?"

"I just do."

"I'm more persistent than your mom. Maybe that's why she called me here instead of Sora, or maybe Takeru. They're the good listener people. I'm a good talker."

"So you're going to talk me out of the bathtub?"

"Yeah."

"Have you ever done this before?"

"What, talked someone out of a bathtub? No, I don't believe I have."

"What about talked someone off of a bridge? Off of a building? Have you ever talked someone out of shooting his brains out? Have you ever talked someone out of slicing his wrists or throat?"

"No, I haven't done any of that, either. But I have talked people out of being sad. See, I like cheering people up. I enjoy making people smile."

"Nothing can make me smile at this point."

"Oh, but you don't know that."

"Don't tell me what I don't or do know, Daisuke!"

"But you don't. You don't know anything right now, do you?"

Ken stared hard at the water. He could see his body through it. He closed his eyes so he wouldn't have to look at it. He was so skinny...

"No, I don't know anything right now."

Daisuke nodded, though Ken couldn't see him through the shower curtain.

"You going to get out of that tub before you swell up and create your own water factory under your skin?"

"No."

"What if I make you?"

"Don't you dare pull back that curtain. If you look at me, I swear I'll kill you. I will."

"You'll kill me, Ken?"

"Yes, I will."

"I highly doubt that."

"Why?"

"Because you're not a murderer, Ken."

"I'm _what_?" Ken asked in a trembling voice. "I'm not a murderer? Have you completely forgotten about the Kaizer?"

"You're not the Kaizer. You're Ken."

"I'm both."

"No, you aren't."

"_Stop trying to confuse me_!" Ken screamed, clutching his head. 

"You're confusing _yourself_, Ken," Daisuke said in a calm voice.

They sat in silence for another while, the only sound being Ken's shuddering breaths and occasional little noises that Daisuke could only decipher as Ken trying not to break down.

"You're going to kill me fucking with my mind like this."

"No, I'm going to save your life."

"You can't save me. You can't even save yourself."

Daisuke smiled slightly and hung his head. "You're right. I can't save myself, and I probably can't save you. You know what I can do, though? I can help _you_ save _yourself_."

"You can't do that either."

"Suddenly you know so much, when a while ago you claimed you knew nothing anymore."

"I was talking about the truth."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know the truth about anything anymore," Ken said in a louder voice, becoming annoyed with this disturbing presence in the room. 

"Then why don't you get your skinny ass out of that bathtub and try to find the truth, huh? Have you ever actually _tried_ to look for it?"

"Why bother?"

"Why not?"

Ken slammed his fist into the bathroom wall. Daisuke cringed and jumped slightly at the jarring noise, and Ken made a small moan of pain and cradled his fist, rocking back and forth slightly.

"See what anger does to you?"

"You're the one that made me angry!"

"I'm only trying to help," Daisuke said gently.

"You're not helping at all! You'll help a lot more if you just go the fuck away and leave me alone!"

"No. You don't want that."

"What the _hell_ do you mean?"

"You don't want me to leave you alone. You're afraid of being alone with yourself. That's why you've been driven crazy like this. That's why you're having this nervous breakdown. You feel like everyone's left you alone. You feel like, now that your longtime crush has moved away to live with the one they love, who's going to smile at you now? Who else is going to warm you when it's too cold to bear? I'll tell you who, Ken. Me, Takeru, Wormmon, your parents, the rest of our friends...we're all going to help you get warm again. You're just scared to be alone, that's all. You aren't, though. You aren't."

Ken let his arms drop limply into the water. The freezing temperature numbed him again, and his lifted his head slightly, sniffling. His lower lip trembled, not from sadness, but from the cold. 

"It's so _cold_ in here."

"You've been sitting in that water for five and a half hours. Of course it's cold. You have to get out of that tub."

Ken rested his head against the bathroom wall, next to the new crack his fist had made. 

"I can't," he whispered.

"What?"

"I can't get out of the tub."

"Why not?"

"I'm too weak."

"Why're you so weak?"

"No energy. Even talking is draining me...you know I haven't eaten in four days, right?"

Daisuke turned towards him, his face now directly in front of the shower curtain. "Need me to help you out?"

"No. I can't let you see me like this..."

"Are you afraid I'll see how skinny you are and judge you?"

Ken was silent for a little while. "Yes."

"I won't judge you, Ken. I promise I won't. You think I care how thin you are? I don't. You're my best friend, Ken. You could have one arm and no legs and your eyes where your ears are and your mouth where your nose is, and I'd still be your best friend."

Ken allowed himself the smallest smile, knowing Daisuke couldn't see it anyways.

"So will you let me help you out of there?"

"Just don't look at me..."

"What do you want me to do, close my eyes? I don't want to accidentally grab something I shouldn't."

Ken smiled slightly again. "Just don't look anywhere but at my face, okay?"

"I'll try not to. I'll try my hardest."

Ken sighed. "Okay, go ahead."

Daisuke pulled the shower curtain back and crouched down to Ken's level. Ken held his arms out and Daisuke gently grabbed him around his chest and pulled him up out of the water. Water spilled over the edge of the tub and soaked his shoes, but he ignored it and carefully lifted Ken out of the bathtub, grabbing a towel and wrapping him in it. He noticed that Ken was shivering almost violently and quickly dried him and walked him to his room.

He sat Ken down on the bed and yanked the bed covers around him, covering his body, and he opened Ken's closet and searched for the warmest, most comfortable-looking clothes he could find. He threw them at Ken, who he figured had to at least be strong enough to clothe himself, and besides, he didn't know if Ken would either be grateful or punch him if he tried to dress him.

Ken was able to dress himself, and Daisuke politely looked away as he did, and then Ken said he was decent and Daisuke turned around and made him get under the bed covers and lay down. He propped Ken's pillow up and said he was going to get more blankets.

Ken nodded and watched Daisuke go. He sighed and stared down at his arms, rubbing them together to warm them up again. Daisuke returned and threw the blankets over him, and then hopped onto the bed next to him and hugged him.

Ken felt nice and cozy in Daisuke's arms. He hadn't been hugged in a long time. 

"How come you don't eat?"

"I forget. I forget to eat."

"That's weird."  


"Yeah..."

"Ken, you know you're beautiful, right?"

Ken blushed. It had also been a long time since he'd received a compliment.

"Well, you are," Daisuke finished, knowing Ken wouldn't answer that, and he smiled at him.

Ken smiled back, and then quickly looked away, hoping to hide his blush. Daisuke had seen it, but politely pretended he hadn't.

"So, want to watch TV?"

"No, but I know you do, so I guess I will."

"Great!" Daisuke grabbed the remote and turned the TV on, flipping channels. Ken smiled and made himself comfortable against his pillow. Daisuke reached a hand up to run through Ken's hair, his eyes still on the TV.

They sat in comfortable silence, watching the programs come out, watching music videos, and watching parts of movies. Ken was filled with a warm, sweet feeling that tingled along his spine and settled comfortably in his stomach, and realized he'd never felt so beautiful in his entire life.

~ ~ ~ ~

A/N: Ne...I was going to make this a part of When I Balance Again but decided to keep that one fluffier and make this separate from it, so I edited when it talked about Takeru and Koushirou and whatever. Um...so did you like it? Please review?


End file.
